


Dive / / I'm The One You Should Love

by WhenIFindLoveAgain



Category: Original Work
Genre: Character Study, Diary, F/F, F/M, Journal, M/M, Novel, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Original Universe, Originally Posted on Tumblr, POV Original Character, Philosophy, Real Life, Underwater, column
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:34:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22272655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhenIFindLoveAgain/pseuds/WhenIFindLoveAgain
Summary: A philosophy piece about the sensation of being underwater, and a synopsis of Australian summers and the power of a deeply longed for epiphany, and the magic of it. The effect of a one-sided romance and written to "Let's Hurt Tonight" slowed down
Kudos: 2





	Dive / / I'm The One You Should Love

It quietly put me out on the side at the thought that he would find someone else to take a place I considered mine even though it was no place of me to say so of any place at all. I want his body but I can't help but picture his body with somebody else; as it has been before, and as it might be tonight. It's something you can't help; those thoughts just come and go when there's a living person who makes such a immeasurable impact on you, and what is it really? No wonder youth and feelings we now age with youth are in constant reflection and mediation and regret. There's infinite scales or wait, progressive time, and then the feeling all us human beings get one day when he look back and go, "Fuck! That went quickly!".

  
My studio is hot, and my skin is damp. Bloody Australian summers. Fucking Australian summers.

  
Human beings dive, and into the waters we dive - most of them are always uncertain, unknown, temptation, dangerous. That's why we dive. When things are warm and sweet and blissful, familiar and honest and wholesome, they are waters we slip into effortlessly.

  
As soon as your head disappears beneath the water's surface, the water's wave, time starts to be counted in your chest and in the back of head on the surface of your brain. How long can you be, even if being beneath the water is a bliss to escape from a world above? How long can you be, even if what you find under the water is the same as the world above? How long is it then in the afterwards, when you're looking up through the water's surface to the world above and you're trying to remember what it's like up there? When you're under the water too long, you drown. But there is a time you can be underwater where you don't drown, but you don't live either as your brain suffers damage which cannot always be healed. Your head and your chest aches, and then comes the agony. It rips through you like a bullet hole and brings you deeper through the water, tearing you apart, and you're already dead without conscious realization - or sometimes too conscious - unless you can pull yourself up and out, or unless someone rescues you.

  
Most of us have the good sense to swim only in particular kind of water's. Fresh water that is dirty beneath, but invigorates us as we feel rocks and silt beneath out feet, kicking up gravitiless dusts in the water and feeling it cloak our hair to our scalp blissfully. Salt water that makes our vision blurred, and changes the way our skin and hand look; exfoliating it, making it for beautiful, making it soft. The salt in it's own way is harsher, but it's cleaner, somehow.

  
Answer epiphany.

  
_I'm the one you should love_

  
_I'm the one you should love_


End file.
